A New Normal

I hate change. I always have and I think I always will. Anyone who really knows me, knows that I hate change.

When people ask me if things are starting to get back to normal now, I would have to say 'no'. 'Normal' has been being able to call my dad when I have questions such as how to do a mail merge to print Christmas letter addresses or trying to find out why we are stopped dead on I-83 when we have 3 cranky kids in the car knowing that if anyone can find out quickly, it is my dad. 'Normal' has been telling the kids we are going to grandma and grandpa's house, not just grandma's house. 'Normal' has been the thought that some day we would get to play pinochle with my parents again once our kids could handle it. 'Normal' has been many things that are not any more. Therefore, things will never be BACK to normal. Instead, a new normal must be created. I have had this happen before, and it is not easy for me since I hate change. When I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease, things were never 'normal' again, but I have since created a new normal although I still mourn the old normal at times. The same with having kids. So now, once again, I am faced with a very big change where a new normal will be created over time and ten years from now, I will probably be used to my new normal (and perhaps several other new normals), but will still always mourn the normal I am just coming from.

I don't know how long it will take for things to feel 'normal' again, I just know that right now they are not 'normal' and they never will be BACK to 'normal'.